"That'll be three hundred gil."

Sighing, Vincent Valentine took out his wallet, trying not to wince as he counted the money in it. He might have enough, he hoped he had enough.

Vincent looked up. "I don't have enough."

The gun merchant immediately pulled the beautiful black rifle off the counter and returned it to its rack. "Anything else you want to look at?" he asked coldly.

Vincent hid another sigh, pretty sure now that there wasn't anything in the store worth buying that he could afford. But he needed a gun. After losing the Death Penalty falling off that cliff, he didn't have any weapons other than his claw, and he preferred not to let anything get close enough to where he could use it.

"Do you have anything for… seventy eight gil?"

The gun merchant's look answered that question and Vincent sighed again. He'd been thinking of making a living hunting Mako beasts, but from the look of it, he'd be working at the local Kentucky Fried Chocobo instead.

Behind him, the door to the shop opened, setting off the little bells hanging above it and the merchant looked up, instantly forgetting about Vincent as he beamed greedily.

"Ah, right on time, sir! That weapon you brought is fully repaired." He opened a closed case, drawing out a weapon, and Vincent was stunned to see the Death Penalty being passed over the counter in front of his eyes.

"What the hell?" he managed.

"Thanks," a familiar voice said.

Vincent turned, his eyes wide. Standing beside him in the store with his usual denim coat over a white t-shirt and jeans, with the ever present flight goggles on his head and half finished cigarette, was Cid Highwind.

"Cid??"

Cid grinned at the stunned man, even as he took the Death Penalty from the merchant. "Hiya, Vince. Didn't expect to see you here." He didn't look unhappy at the idea though.

Vincent gaped at him. "What are you doing with my gun?" he blurted.

"Getting it repaired." Cid eyed the weapon and tossed a pouch to the merchant. "Thanks." He grinned at Vincent. "Why are you here?"

"Trying to buy a new gun."

Cid peered at his wallet, still open in Vincent's hand. "With that? Ain't no way you're getting anything good for that kinda gil." He handed him the Death Penalty. "Here ya go."

Vincent took it, confused. The last time he saw Cid, he'd saved his life, then stolen a kiss that still made Vincent feel a little weak in the knees when he remembered it. He'd decided to avoid the pilot as more trouble than he was worth, disturbed by the feelings he woke deep inside him, and the sight of him standing in front of him only three weeks after that decision, half a continent away from where they last met, confused him.

His eyes narrowed. "Are you following me?"

Cid immediately looked hurt. "Would I do a thing like that?"

"Yes."

The pilot chuckled and grabbed his arm. "Well, I didn't. I guess we both just decided to go to the best fuckin' gun merchant on the Planet on our own. Must be Lady Luck workin' her magic." Vincent wasn't sure how to take that last statement as Cid led him out of the store. "You saying you don't want to see me?"

"Yes..." Vincent blurted and winced. "No. I don't know." He looked at the Death Penalty. "Um, what do I owe you for this?" It must have cost a fair amount to have it repaired and the ex-Turk hoped he had enough.

"More gil than you've got," Cid grinned. Leaning over, he breathed into his ear. "I'd like to take you back to my hotel room and have you let me fuck you senseless. But you can pay me back with a kiss if you want."

Vincent's heart started hammering madly, remembering Cid kissing him back on the Highwind, then again in that shallow lake. The sight of him in jockey shorts made nearly transparent by the lake waters… Suddenly, he got a very large urge to run.

Cid put up his hands. "Hey, just a kiss, baby. Nothing more than that." He stepped over behind a tree where they were less visible and put his hands behind his back. "I won't touch you, promise."

Vincent bit his lip. He owed Cid his life as well as the Death Penalty. One kiss wasn't much to give in return for that. There was no danger. Just a quick peck on the lips and he could be done with him for good. No guilt, no debts. Swallowing, he holstered the Death Penalty across his back and walked over to him. "All right."

Cid grinned and spit his cigarette to the ground, stepping on it. Closing his eyes, he leaned forward, a slight grin on his face. "Whenever you're ready."

Vincent sighed and stepped up closer, only inches away from him. He was a handbreadth taller than Cid and he made sure no one was looking at them before he bent over slightly and touched his lips to the pilot's.

It wasn't much of a kiss. Unsure, Vincent pushed his lips against Cid's a little harder, not certain it was enough. Cid mouthed him slightly and heat rushed through the ex-Turk at the movement. Cid still had his eyes shut so he returned the gesture a bit and their lips moved together, teasing and tasting, deepening without Vincent's really realizing it until their tongues met and stroked together.

Fire blazed through Vincent's body, hotter than anything he'd felt in a long time. His eyes closing, he brought his hands up to cup Cid's face, forgetting himself as he deepened the kiss still further, the two of them fighting for breath as the kiss grew more passionate, more out of control. Vincent laced his good hand through Cid's hair, his claw wrapping around behind the man to pull him closer, but still Cid didn't touch him, though Vincent could feel his erection pulsing through his jeans.

That woke him up. Abruptly Vincent realized what he was doing and pulled back. "I have to go," he stammered and hurried away, his heart still hammering and his body hot. It stayed that way for a long time. Behind him, Cid slowly opened his eyes, his face flushed.

"Wow," he mumbled happily to himself. "That sure as hell was one fucking good kiss."

Midgar II was still a fairly small city, building up on the wreckage of the old. At first, it looked like the destroyed city would have been abandoned entirely, but too many of the survivors didn't want to leave. So they rebuilt, putting in homes, businesses, warehouses and more. Not to the extent that the original city had, not yet, but enough that two people could find some privacy in an alley that was still clean and new, without the trash and smell that would haunt it in later years.

Cid Highwind leaned heavily against the man who stood before him with his back against the bricks of the alley wall. His left leg he kept wedged between the other man's legs, ignoring his partner's weak knees as he held him up and rubbed it slowly against the arousal hidden in his pants. His hands roamed under the other man's cloak, running over the cloth of his clothing, stroking gently while his mouth worked against his.

For his part, Vincent Valentine gripped Cid's shoulders, mostly just trying to hold on for the ride as his legs threatened to give out under him, his entire body wracked with shivers of pleasure. Distantly, he wondered what was happening. He'd been working tracking down and killing Mako beasts and had come to Midgar II to collect the bounty on one. He'd run into Cid on the sidewalk, who swore up and down that he wasn't following him and had just brought in a cargo of computer equipment from Wutei. Cid invited him for a drink and somehow they ended up in this alley halfway there, kissing until Vincent could barely think. He was half a breath away from giving himself to the pilot, he knew that, and moaned into his mouth, everything spinning.

Cid's tongue stroked along inside his mouth, tasting of cigarettes, before moving down along his jaw and neck. His stubble scratched gently along Vincent's skin, somehow feeling incredibly good as Cid found his neck. Vincent sagged against the wall at the feelings it gave him. "Oh God…"

Cid reached under his shirt, pulling it out from his pants and reaching up to find his nipples. Abruptly, Vincent felt far too warm. "Vince," Cid whispered against his neck as he started to unbutton his shirt, obviously not caring who might come along. "Baby, you are so fucking beautiful."

Vincent leaned his head back against the cool brick, gasping for breath. He wanted Cid, wanted him so badly the need burned in him. He wanted the pilot inside, to be inside the pilot and whimpered, his erection agonizing under the constant stimulation from Cid's leg.

"I want you," Cid murmured, kissing his way down Vincent's chest as he lowered himself to his knees. Vincent's fingers tangled in his hair as the pilot reached for the belts around his pants. "Oh, baby, I want to fuck you 'til you scream."

Vincent just burned hotter inside at that, staring down at the thinning blonde hair as Cid unzipped his pant and reached inside… Vincent almost shrieked, muscles tightening as Cid took him in his hand and his eyes gaped wide as Cid took him into his - he hadn't thought - took him deep into his - he hadn't imagined anyone could do such a thing, or that it would feel like this - took him into his mouth and started to suck. Suddenly, Vincent couldn't get enough air, his fingers digging into Cid's hair until he was sure it had to hurt, fighting to keep from clenching with his claws as well, but the pilot just wrapped his arms around his hips and pulled him closer, his mouth still moving.

Everything inside the ex-Turk focused down to that one point between his legs and the sounds of pleasure Cid made as he worked. Vincent shook, only the wall against his back holding him up, feeling himself drawing closer to release and still Cid drew him deeper. Vincent tensed, the pressure almost unbearable.

Two women walked by the mouth of the alley, talking and laughing to each other. They didn't see Vincent, and certainly not the man half hidden by his red cloak, but Vincent stared at them in horror, suddenly seeing another woman's face interposed on theirs.

Lucretia…

"Oh, God, no," he gasped, pushing Cid off of him just before it was too late. Wrapping his cloak tight around himself, he stumbled for the street, his body protesting the sudden denial of its needs.

"Vince?" Cid yelled behind him. "Where the hell are you going? Did I do something wrong? Vince!"

Vincent shook his head, afraid to look back at him, knowing if he did he'd go back. "No, no, I'm sorry, I can't do this. I'm sorry!"

He fled into the night.

Cid cursed long and loudly as the ex-Turk disappeared down the street, but he didn't follow him. Vincent did have the right to say no.

But oh how he wanted him. Cid's loins ached at the memory of Vincent's slender body against his, his eyes closed, head back and gasping, dark strands stuck to his pale skin from sweat. The trembling against him even as he returned Cid's kisses with a passion the pilot had never seen before in any lover he'd ever had. Vincent was so beautiful aroused Cid hadn't cared that they were in an alley; he'd have taken the ex-Turk right there, then got him into the Highwind to have him some more.

Cid found himself leering. Vincent could run all he wanted, Lady Luck was on Cid's side. He'd never actively looked for the other man since AVALANCHE broke up, but the two of them kept crossing paths and each time, they got closer to that oh so sweet moment. Cid didn't have to force Vincent. Vince would talk himself into going that next step, and Cid would be waiting.

Wincing at the discomfort in his jeans, Cid headed back towards the Highwind and a very cold shower.

Back at the hotel suite he'd rented for his visit, Vincent did the same thing.

Ice cold, the water pounded on his body, beading on his chest and abdomen as he hugged himself, his dripping hair stuck to his back and all around his face, his eyes half closed and miserable.

What was wrong with him? Was he just too stupid to learn? Time after time, he'd had it beat into his head. If he loved someone, they died. His parents - dead before he reached adulthood. Sephiroth - loved from the instant he saw him as a newborn but mad as an adult and finally put down. Lucretia…

"Lucretia," he whispered, turning his face into the cold spray. He'd loved her more than he'd thought it possible to love anyone, and his love for her led her to her death.

Now he was falling for Cid.

Why? he kept asking himself. Why Cid? Why in all the wonders of the Lifestream did he start to fall in love with a boorish, rude, obnoxious, arrogant, horny, sexy… Vincent closed his eyes, shivering now from the cold as he wrapped his arms tighter around himself. Cid was strong. He had the kind of inner will that would never be broken, and he was a warrior, one strong enough to go into the final battle with Sephiroth himself and live. He wasn't so easy to kill as a female scientist, or a married couple who'd never known violence in their lives until the end. Cid would spit into Vincent's curse.

And what if he dies anyway? A tiny voice asked him. The icy water flowed down his body but he ignored his shivering. He loved Cid. Since he'd awoken after his long sleep, Cid had always been there when he needed him, never thinking of him as a freak or monster, always lifting him out of the darkness that threatened to consume him. Cid took care of him after Vincent's failed attempt to kill himself. He saved him from those Mako-beasts and from Chaos. He found him desirable enough that he wouldn't even wait for privacy before letting his needs be known. He made Vincent feel alive.

"If I love him, he'll die," he whispered to himself as he sagged against the wall of the shower. That's what always happened. He loved someone and they died.

And more, what if Cid didn't love him? What if all he wanted was a quick roll and nothing more?. Vincent couldn't divide himself that much, couldn't give his body without also giving his heart, and once he gave his heart to Cid, it would only be a matter of time before he lost him like all the others.

Vincent slid down to crouch in the tub, still wrapped around himself, hair falling over his face like a shroud.

"Damnit," he whispered.

The tiny town had only one bar, one known to be rowdy when the miners got off at night, but usually all but deserted during the day. The barkeep was in the back, checking his inventory, pretty sure that his only two customers weren't terribly likely to notice he was gone, if they were even aware of anything beyond each other.

Cid hadn't seen Vincent in two months, not until he was sitting in this bar having a drink after coming to pick up raw ore from the mines and Vincent walked in the door. He was still hunting Mako beasts, Cid gathered, and had stopped to get more ammo.

He only knew that peripherally, though, and frankly didn't care. At present he was sitting in his chair, Vincent straddling his lap and apparently attempting to suck his tonsils right out. Cid's fingers dug into the ex-Turk's backside, holding him tight against him while their mouths battled with each other and his erection threatened to tear out of his jeans.

Vincent cupped Cid's face with both hands gently as he kissed him, shifting to get his body closer. Cid didn't know who'd initiated this mad kiss for sure, but he wasn't going to protest it. After Vincent fled from the alley in Midgar II, he'd decided to take it slower, talk more instead of going straight for the good stuff. That lasted maybe five minutes.

Quite happy with how things were going, Cid kissed Vincent harder, eyes opening to see the dark-haired man's were closed, a look of total surrender on his flushed face. Cid brought up one hand and laced it into that gorgeous hair, cupping the back of his head and earning himself a soft sigh from the other man.

"I thought you were going to be all shy again after last time," Cid whispered. Vincent's red eyes opened to look at him, glazed with need. "Oh, fuck it." Gripping him tight, Cid stood and lifted the other man right up, depositing him on his back on the table. The beer bottles they'd been drinking from tumbled onto the floor. Vincent just groaned, his hair spilling like silk over the wood.

"You're not getting away from me this time," Cid whispered with a grin. "Not until you let me have my way with you."

Humming to himself, the barkeep came out of the back and stopped. "Oh, fer th' love of…" He didn't have anything against same sex relationships, but that didn't mean he wanted them consummated on top of a table in his bar. "Do I have to get a hose?" he yelled, but the two ignored him, too involved in each other. The barkeep got the distinct impression that clothes were going to be flying in every direction in another minute.

The door opened and one of the bar's better customers - and sometimes bouncer - walked in. The barkeep looked at him in relief. "Barrett! Just in time. Can you get those two to cut it out before they get me arrested for having sex shows?"

Barrett looked at the two and one eyebrow rose. His face torn between a smirk and nausea, he walked over.

"Hi, Cid! Hi, Vincent! What the hell do you think you're doing?"

Cid stopped what he was doing at the sound of that unexpected and very unwanted voice. Opening his eyes, he looked into Vincent's. From his expression, and the fact that he'd gone sheet white, then red as his cloak, Cid could tell he recognized the voice too.

"Shit," Cid muttered, then lifted his head, grinning. "Heya, Barrett! How th' fuck ya been? I ain't seen you since AVALANCHE broke up. You livin' here?"

Huge and muscled, with a right arm that ended at a weapons' attachment, Barrett grinned at him. "Just makin' some quick cash in the mines and doing the odd bit of bouncing. What about you two?"

"Um, here to pick up cargo." Cid straightened up, tucking his shirt back in his pants, and Vincent instantly took the opportunity to bolt. Without saying a word, he rolled off the table and ran out the door. Cid watched him go regretfully. "Fuck."

Barrett shifted uncomfortably. "So, I didn't know you and Vincent were so, um, close," he coughed.

Cid glared at him, then shrugged and lit a cigarette. "Not close enough. How about we change the fuckin' subject? Tell me, how's Marlene?"

Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid. Gasping, Vincent ran across the small town to where he'd left his Chocobo in a stable. What was he thinking? That never should have happened, he'd decided it would never happen again, then Barrett of all people walks in and sees them. In a public bar. Vincent couldn't believe how out of control things had become.

Running into the stable, he ignored the stable hand as he grabbed his saddle and gear and put the tack on his blue Chocobo. Swinging aboard, he kicked it in the direction of the mountains, the bird squawking as it ran.

Never again.

Groaning, Cid rolled over and reached for the phone. "This better be important…. Oh, hi, Tifa." Blinking, he looked at his clock. Six pm. Damn, couldn't even yell at her for waking him up early, even if he didn't get back to Rocket Town until dawn. He shifted onto his back. "…Yeah, I've been doing fine… Business going fine... Running cargo to wherever the hell and doing courier shit too…. Engaged to Cloud? No shit?…. Yeah, I'll be there…. What do you mean, bring him?…. No… No, I'm not fucking Vincent… okay, you didn't say 'fucking' but that's what you meant… Oh, you heard about that, didn't you? Shit, Barrett's got a big mouth… No, I haven't seen him since then… No, I don't know if he's embarrassed… No, I don't know if he's going to your fucking wedding… No, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to call it a fucking wedding… Yes… Yes… Yes, I'll give him your best if I see him… Yes, I'll make sure he knows about the wedding… No, I won't fuck him on the cake table if he shows up… Yes, I know you didn't say that, but that's what you meant…. Whatever. Bye, Tifa."

Cid hung up the phone and groaned. He should have expected that. Barrett was Tifa's best friend, of course he'd tell her what he saw. And being the gossip that she was, probably everybody knew what happened in that bar by now.

"I'm getting too old for this," he muttered as he stood and stomped to the shower. He didn't even want to think how Vincent would react to the news. Probably run off and hide again. For a man who was either in his late twenties or late fifties - depending on how you looked at it - Vincent was as uncertain as a schoolgirl from time to time.

Muttering, as always, about the crappy water pressure in his house, Cid took a shower, then put on an old ratty robe and shuffled yawning into the kitchen. Shera smiled at him as she set a plate on the table. "Hi, Cid."

Cid just grunted, not bothering to wonder what she was doing in his house or how she managed to time food for him so well. Shera was just sort of there. A good mechanic, a tolerable cook, but otherwise completely boring. He didn't have the first clue why she stuck around. It wasn't like he paid her, or even gave her the time of day half the time. But no matter how often he yelled, she stuck around and so he tolerated her, rather like a comfortable pair of slippers.

Cid slid into his seat and she handed him a teacup. "Thanks," he mumbled and took a sip, then started in on the steak and potatoes on the plate. "Auxiliary engine on Highwind needs some adjustment."

Shera sat on the other side of the table and smiled at him. "Of course." She watched him eat through her thick glasses, her hair pulled back into a ponytail, and twined her fingers together nervously. "Um, I was wondering if you'd maybe like to go to the pub later tonight. They have a live band performing."

Cid cocked an eyebrow at her. "No."

Her face fell. "Are you sure? I-it's no trouble for me to pay our way."

Cid looked at the plain, mousy woman sitting across from him and thought of Vincent, with his pale skin and long dark hair, and the passion that burned just below the surface. "No," he repeated.

"But..."

"I fucking said no, Shera!" Throwing down his fork, he stomped out of the room, leaving Shera huddled into herself behind him.

Wearily, Vincent rode his Chocobo along a dusty road, staring at his saddle horn while getting bumped by the head of a mako-beast roped behind him. It was his proof of his latest kill. All he had to do was take it to the nearest official and he'd get the bounty for it. Hunting dumb but dangerous animals was getting old, but there was nothing else he could do. The Turks were disbanded, even if he wanted to be one again and he had no urge to become a mercenary. And he wasn't too likely to do well in an ordinary job, what with being thirty years behind the times. He just didn't fit in anywhere, not being the freak he was.

Cid didn't think so, his mind reminded him, the memory making his groin stir. Cid thought he was beautiful, worth something. Vincent sighed. Cid was not going to happen, for the pilot's own sake. He wouldn't unload his curse on him, no matter how much the other man made him want to be with him. For forever, not just one night alone. That on its own would scare the pilot off.

Vincent sighed. It didn't matter. He wouldn't see Cid again. The Planet was a big place. They wouldn't cross paths again.

His Chocobo squawked happily, trotting into a town, and Vincent looked up. It was a small, dusty town, mostly a collection of houses and hangers with a lopsided rocket in the background.

Vincent closed his eyes. Oh, god, no… Rocket Town. He'd ridden right to Rocket Town, and even now he could see the Highwind sitting on the runway.

He wanted to turn his bird and race out of there, needed to get out of there while there was still time. He had to, or Cid could die, he knew that.

Slowly, Vincent nudged his Chocobo towards one of the houses in particular and dismounted, tying it to the bar in front. He couldn't do it. If it damned them both, he couldn't do it. Silently, he walked up to the door and knocked. It opened a minute later and he stepped into Cid's arms, put his own arms around his neck and buried his head against his shoulder, all without a word.

Vincent… Not wanting to question how or why, Cid slid his hands up Vincent's back, tilting his head to kiss him. Vincent met him halfway, no resistance in his calm face as he pressed their lips together. Cid's libido immediately went through the roof.

"C'mon," he whispered, guiding him inside, still kissing him as he led him past the door into the kitchen. Shera started to rise from her chair, eyes huge, but Cid waved her out behind Vincent's back and guided him the rest of the way to his bedroom, sure that the other man hadn't seen her.

They stepped into the bedroom and Cid closed the door, immediately forgetting about her for more immediate interests. Vincent bit Cid's lip gently and stood back. A hand moved to the clasp of his cloak and it fell around his feet, leaving him slim and vulnerable, dressed solely in black except for the red bandana. He pulled that off one-handed and stepped back up to Cid, cupping his face to kiss him again.

Cid reached up to hold his hands. "Are you going to stay?" he whispered.

Vincent cracked open his eyes to gaze at him. "Yes," he whispered back.

Cid licked his lips, wanting to be sure. "Will you let me make love to you?"

Vincent's eyes opened fully, then he kissed him. "Yes, Cid."

Cid groaned in relief, pulling him close. Vincent ran his good hand through his short hair, kissing him deeply, his claw reaching down between them to pull the belt loose on Cid's robe. Cid let him, shrugging out of it to stand naked before him. Vincent pulled back and looked.

"And you said I was beautiful," he murmured.

To his surprise, Cid found himself blushing. He hadn't even blushed when Barrett caught them making out in the bar. He kissed him and pushed him over onto his back on the bed. "Careful, you'll make me feel all embarrassed."

"I didn't think that was possible," Vincent murmured, good hand tracing over the pilot's chest. His claw he kept to one side, the sharp points clear of both their bodies. "I need your help here."

"You got it." Cid kissed him and looked down, quickly unbuttoning the ex-Turk's shirt, helping him get it off before laying him back and starting on his pants. Vincent lay there and watched him, the shyness gone. When he gave himself, he gave it all, Cid realized and climbed up onto the bed to lie beside him and continue their exploration of one another's bodies.

Time slowed down. Gently, they moved together, soft touches discovering what they liked. Mouths on skin, the sweep of long hair…

"Cid…" Vincent whispered after a time, eyes closed, gasping as he mouthed at Cid's receptive lips, loving the feel of his rough hands on his back.

"Mm…?"

"Back in the alley, what you did back in the alley." He opened his eyes to see Cid flushed and breathing deeply, his eyes a smoky grey now instead of his usual blue. "What was that?"

Cid smirked. "You want me to do that to you?"

"No, I want to do it to you."

Cid shivered, pulling him close. Vincent kissed him, then worked his way down his body to his hips and heard Cid's cries as he took him into his mouth like he'd seen, tasting his sweat as he worked his tongue around him.

"Oh god," Cid whispered. He'd had blow jobs before, but none like this one. Never been in love before, he thought and swallowed. He loved Vincent? He'd known he wanted him, but how did that get turned into love?

Because Vincent was everything he wanted. Silence and passion, courage and strength. The opposite to everything he was, the wall who could resist his crashing tides. Someone who could meet him as an equal without ever backing down, or forcing him to.

Desperate, Cid pulled Vincent back up to kiss his mouth hungrily, passionately. Vincent met him evenly, pulling their sweat slick bodies together. They'd been on their sides, but Vincent sat up, and as Cid sat up as well to meet him, straddled him, his hair falling around the pilot's face as he gripped his shoulders and pushed him down, finding him and at last taking him inside.

Cid's cries echoed through the house and rang softly outside to the woman who sat by the Chocobo at the front, sobbing, but Vincent was silent, even as he gave Cid everything he was, body, heart and soul.

Vincent woke up feeling deliciously sore and sated. Not fully conscious yet, he luxuriated in it, and the musky scent of the man who lay against his back, snoring with one arm over Vincent's side, still inside him from their last bout of lovemaking. Vincent hadn't really kept track of how many times they'd made love during the night, but his eyes were gritty from lack of sleep and he felt as though he wouldn't be able to move for a week. His entire body was relaxed, like it hadn't been in years. Not since before he met Lucretia.

Suddenly, Vincent felt cold, a creeping horror rising up through his body to choke him and steal his joy. Oh, God, Lucretia, what have I done? Careful not to wake his lover, Vincent pushed his long black hair out of his way and looked over his shoulder at the pilot. Cid had a goofy little grin on his face as he slept.

Vincent felt like shooting himself. What had he done? He'd known he couldn't be with Cid, known it deep down in his gut, but still he went to him like some out of control whore. Gently, Vincent disengaged himself, slipping out of the pilot's arms. It wasn't Cid's fault, it was his. It was all his, and if Cid paid for his mistakes like Lucretia and his parents did, he knew he would finally never be able to forgive himself.

The only thing Vincent could think to do was to get away from Cid before he destroyed him, go somewhere where he and Cid wouldn't just run into each other as they had been for the last months. Vincent silently moved around the room, gathering his clothes and dressing, eyes never leaving Cid in the fear he would wake and so he could fill his memory with the sight of the man. He loved Cid, loved him as completely as he had Lucretia, and since he loved him, he couldn't have him. His heart ached to return to the bed, pull Cid into his arms and never let go, but instead he breathed a goodbye and slipped out of the room.

Weakness made him stop in the kitchen and dig up a pencil and piece of paper. He should just vanish, make it easy for Cid to decide he was just a one time thing and forget him, but Vincent had to explain what he was doing, even if it was only the one night Cid wanted. His eyes stinging strangely and his mouth tight, Vincent wrote out a letter and left it on the kitchen table. Slipping outside, he woke his Chocobo and led it away from the house before he mounted, riding away while looking back for as long as the little town was in view.

Yawning, Cid woke up from what easily had to be the best night of sex in his life. His whole body felt good and he was already dreaming up ideas for what to do next. Vincent was better than he'd have imagined possible, and if he had his way, the ex-Turk wouldn't be leaving his side for the next lifetime. Perhaps he wouldn't mind becoming a cargo hauler, he mused to himself. Or even going with him into space. He could rebuild the rocket for two with a little extra work.

Cid yawned again, opening his eyes as he groped along the bed searching for his lover. Not finding him, he sat up and grabbed a pack of smokes from the bedside table. Vincent always woke up early when they were in AVALANCHE, he was probably getting something to eat. Lighting up a cigarette, he climbed out of bed, dragged on his robe and wandered into the kitchen. Idly, he saw a folded piece of paper on the table and picked it up, flipping it open to scan the handwriting inside.

"FUUUUUUCK!!!!"

Panting wearily, the blue Chocobo stumbled to a stop in front of the old mansion. Vincent patted its neck gently as he dismounted. He'd run the bird hard from Rocket Town and it had served him well. Murmuring gently to it, he slung the Death Penalty over his shoulder and took the rest of the gear and tack into his arms. A slap on its haunch sent the bird trotting towards freedom and Vincent looked up at the now dilapidated mansion. A lot of horrible memories were tied up in that old building, along with some good ones, and with a sigh he went inside.

Dust covered everything, the footsteps Cloud and the others had left when they first came now faded. Vincent put all his gear on the front table except for the Death Penalty and climbed the stairs to the second floor. He wouldn't be needing them anymore, but he doubted anyone would steal them. No one wanted to step into the ShinRa mansion.

On the second floor, Vincent went to one room in particular. There was a secret panel in the wall there that led to the basement. Going through that, he descended a circular staircase down to the subterranean levels where Hojo and the other scientists had done their work. He didn't go into the main labs where he'd been turned into what he was now, or the library where Sephiroth lost his mind. Instead he went to a crypt at the end of the hall. There a half dozen coffins waited, all but one with broken, desiccated skeletons inside. Vincent ignored them, headed for the one empty one in the middle. It was rigged with a stasis generator under the bed, designed to put whoever lay inside it into hibernation once the lid was closed. It was where Vincent had slept and dreamed for thirty long years.

Vincent looked at it for a long time. He'd had nothing but nightmares in there, nothing but horror heaped on horror until he was amazed he didn't go mad. But he hadn't gone in there willingly, perhaps that made the difference. Now he did. Silently, Vincent placed the Death Penalty on top of one of the other coffins and laid down in it, taking a deep breath as he gripped the lid. He had to do this. If he went back to wandering the Planet, Cid would find him. Even if the pilot didn't look for him, he would find him. But Cid didn't know where Vincent's coffin was, he hadn't been part of the team at that point. By staying here, Vincent could keep Cid safe and, he hoped, not feel so alone.

"Maybe I'll dream of Cid," he whispered to himself without much hope and lay back, pulling the lid closed after him. The soft boom of it echoed through the crypt briefly, but no other sound followed it, not even that of breathing.

"Why do bowties have to be so tight?" Cloud complained, trying to dig a finger between his and his skin.

"If it's uncomfortable," Red pointed out. "Then don't wear it."

"Are you kidding? Tifa would kill me."

Red chuckled under his breath and Cloud sighed. He was happy, he really was. It was his wedding day, how could he not be happy? But at the same time he was scared out of his mind. He'd heard that it was normal to feel that way, but he was more freaked than he had been before he went up against Sephiroth.

Cloud sighed, looking up at his groomsmen and best man. Barrett looked as uncomfortable as Cloud felt, Reeve dashing in his suit, Red undressed as usual but his fur neatly brushed. The ranks looked a little thin, especially compared to all the female friends Tifa had attending her. Cloud had been hoping for two more friends to show up, but with the wedding starting in fifteen minutes, he wasn't very hopeful anymore.

Suddenly, the door to the room the groom's party had been locked into banged open and Cid stormed in. He was dressed in a suit - the wrong colour - with his flight goggles on his uncombed head, his face rough with a three day growth of beard and a cigarette dangling from his lips. The suit itself looked like it had been slept in for a few days and he had dark bags under his eyes.

"Jeez, Cid," Barrett told him . "You look like shit."

"Fuck you," Cid muttered. He took the cigarette out of his mouth, dumping the ash on the church carpet. "Now, I don't want to hear any fucking jokes about this." He took a deep breath. "Has ANYbody seen Vincent in the last six months?"

They all stared at him. "Um, no," Cloud admitted. "I thought Tifa said he was with you. Why?"

The pilot glared at him and Cloud was shocked to see a glimmer of pain deep in his eyes. Cid had visibly aged since he saw him last. "Because he's fucking missing, that's why!"

They all stared at him. Cloud hadn't ever seen Cid this upset, not even when Tiny Bronco was shot down by ShinRa. Belatedly, he remembered what Tifa had told him Barrett saw. Cloud hadn't given much weight to the rumour, but from the look of it, it might not have been all that exaggerated.

"Maybe you just haven't crossed paths. It's a big Planet."

Cid glared at him. "Yeah? Well, I have been to every fucking town, village and city on this rock that shows up on a map. Nobody's seen him!"

"Maybe he's trying not to attract attention," Reeve suggested.

"Have you ever known Vincent NOT to attract attention??" Cid all but screamed. "He's drop dead gorgeous, he's got red eyes, he's got a fucking metal CLAW and he turns into a demon! He can't NOT be noticed! It's like he dropped off the face of the fucking Planet!"

Cloud got a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach as Cid's voice took on an edge of hysteria. He was acting like coming here was his last hope and he was right. Vincent was someone who stuck in peoples' minds. He was too exotic not to.

"Did he leave any notes or anything?" Cloud asked softly.

Cid nodded, pulling a wrinkled, folded piece of paper out of his pocket. "He left this on my kitchen table."

Cloud took it, Reeve and Barrett looking over his shoulder as he unfolded it. The paper was soft and faded, obviously something that Cid had read a lot. Cloud looked at the handwriting.

Cid - I can't even begin to tell you how sorry I am. Last night meant everything to me, but I can't stay. If I do, I'll only endanger you. I should have been honest with you from the start. Don't think I never wanted you, I did, and I tried to fight it for so long, but I don't deserve you. And you deserve someone better than me. Someone who isn't a monster. I'm cursed, Cid. I always have been. My entire life, everyone I've ever loved has died horribly and I can't stand the thought of that happening to you too. That's why I'm leaving. Please don't try to find me, you won't. Forget about me and go on with your life. Mine ended a long time ago, but you made me feel alive for a little while at least and I do wish it could have lasted.. Thank you. Love, Vincent

"Oh, shit," Reeve whispered.

Cloud closed his eyes, swallowing his dread and wishing that this had happened on any other day. I didn't want to find out one of my friends is dead on my wedding day, he thought desperately, but life had never been terribly fair to Cloud Strife. He supposed something had to go wrong to balance his finally getting Tifa.

"I think this is a suicide note, Cid," he murmured softly, looking at his friend.

Snarling, Cid grabbed the paper, folding it again tenderly as he swore. "Bullshit! Vincent wouldn't do that!"

"Cid... we all know Vincent had emotional problems…"

"Don't talk about him in the fucking past tense!" Cid yelled. "He's not dead! He wouldn't kill himself because he knows he can't! He already tried."

The other four former members of AVALANCHE gaped at him. "He what?"

Cid pointed his fingers at his head like a gun. "He blew his brains out with the Death Penalty right after we disbanded. He healed. Vincent can't commit suicide."

Cloud gaped at him, stunned. He hadn't had the first idea that happened and Cid didn't look happy to admit it.

"Then where is he?" Reeve muttered.

"I don't know! I'm going crazy trying to find out!"

Red looked up at them from where he sat on the floor, tail flicking back and forth idly. "He must have gone back to his coffin then."

Cid stared at him, then lunged forward, the hope so bright on his face it was almost frightening. "Why didn't I think of that??" He grabbed Cloud by the shoulders. "You gotta take me there!"

Cloud looked at him wryly as the priest knocked softly on the door. "Do you mind if I get married first?" he asked.

"Cid, um, you wanna maybe slow down? BEFORE I lose my LUNCH??" Cloud screamed.

Cid just leaned harder on the accelerator. "Nope."

Through a mirror, he could see Cloud sitting behind him, glaring at his back, his new bride in his arms clinging to him and looking rather green. She also looked like she wanted to pound the pilot for hijacking her and her husband on the first day of their honeymoon, but they were the only ones who knew precisely how to get to Vincent's coffin. Cid leaned back in his seat and tried to make the Tiny Bronco go faster. He'd pay them back later, though from the look on Tifa's face, the payment was going to come straight out of his hide.

Below them, the landscape raced by at more than supersonic speed. Tiny Bronco had never gone so fast, her engines straining, but still she wasn't moving fast enough. Cid didn't want his lover lying in that coffin for a second longer than necessary and rage burned in at him at Vincent for doing so.

"I'll kill him for putting me through this," he muttered and barrel-rolled the Tiny Bronco into a downward descent without losing any speed as Nibelheim came into view. His two passengers both shrieked behind him. He was going to make Vincent pay for this. Damned ex-Turk.

Cid waited for the last minute to break, his passengers jerking forward against their restraints with some choice curses as he brought the tiny ship to a hover in front of an old, broken down mansion that was the largest structure in the small town. Not waiting for Cloud and Tifa, he powered down and leaped out.

Cloud and Tifa found him in the front room a few minutes later, hands reverently brushing the dust off some Chocobo tack and saddlebags left on a big oak table.

"This is his," he told them quietly, his chest tight. "Vincent's here."

Cloud looked at him, obviously swallowing what he was going to say originally. "Let's go get him then." He started upstairs.

"Hey! I thought you said he'd be in the basement!"

Cloud grinned over his shoulder at him, one hand laced with Tifa's. "The stairs to the basement are upstairs."

"Stupid fucking building…"

"I hate this place," Tifa muttered.

"We won't be here long," Cloud assured her.

Cid followed along behind her, wishing they'd hurry but feeling guilty. "Um, thanks for doing this."

Tifa made a face. "Oh, NOW you thank us! You've already ruined our honeymoon, you jerk."

Cid sighed. "What would you do if it were Cloud who went missing?"

Tifa looked at him, her face softening. "You really love him, don't you?"

"Yeah…"

"Did you tell him that?" she asked.

Cid just shrugged. "Didn't give me the chance. That's not the problem though." He followed them into a library where Cloud opened a secret panel Cid never would have found and led them downstairs. Cid's heart started pounding as they went down into the basement and finally into a crypt with one closed coffin in the centre.

"He's in there," Cloud told him. "We left the coffin open after we found him. Besides, here's the Death Penalty." He handed it to Tifa.

Cid ignored him, moving slowly towards the coffin. His Vincent was inside, thinking he was cursed, sleeping… Suddenly determined to get him out, he grabbed the lid and heaved it upwards so hard it fell over onto the ground with a crash. Cid looked in and his breath caught.

Vincent lay inside, his hands folded over his breast and his dark hair framing his sleeping face like a shroud. Cid had never seen him look so beautiful before, but he couldn't even tell if he was breathing.

"He's alive," Cloud assured him. "He's in stasis."

Cid nodded and crouched down, tremblingly reaching out to cup a hand to Vincent's cool cheek. The ex-Turk's brow tensed at the touch and he made a soft, questioning sound in his throat before he opened his eyes.

Cid bent over and kissed him gently, suddenly unable to yell like he'd been planning. "Bullshit," he whispered instead.

Vincent stared at him, still half asleep and confused. "…what?.."

"Bullshit. Everything in your letter was bullshit." Carefully, Cid worked his hands under the other man and lifted him out. Turning, he put him in Cloud's arms. "Get him out of here," he ordered. "There's something I have to do."

"Um, right. Come on, Tifa." Cloud cradled Vincent to his chest, carrying him out despite his sleepy protests. Tifa followed behind, clutching the Death Penalty to her. Cid glared at the hated coffin for another moment, then kicked it and went searching through the labs.

It wasn't hard to find what he needed. Cid soaked the coffin and crypt with gasoline stocked for the lab's generators, then proceeded to douse down everything else in the mansion he could. Tossing the last barrel down, he strode out to the Tiny Bronco. Vincent was sitting against one of Tiny Bronco's wheels, Tifa and Cloud crouching before him getting him to sip some broth from the ship's stores. He watched Cid with wide eyes as the pilot reached into the ship for a flare gun.

"Cid..?"

"You're not going back," Cid told him gruffly. "You're never going back into that hell hole again." Taking a shooter's stance, he aimed at the open door of the mansion with both hands and pulled the trigger. The flare raced inside to where he'd soaked the old wood with gas and laid out some even less stable compounds he'd found as well.

The ShinRa mansion exploded.

"Wow," Cloud laughed. "You know, I would have paid money to see this."

Vincent stared at the flames, the fire reflecting in his red eyes. He was white as he watched the old building burn. Striding up, Cid grabbed his good hand, yanked him to his feet and slung him over his shoulder. "I'll be back in a few minutes," he muttered to Cloud and Tifa who just waved him away, happy to watch the mansion burn. Cid heard Cloud saying something about marshmallows as he carried Vincent past the mansion to someplace where no one would bother them.

Vincent sighed softly in his ear. "I can walk, you know."

"Shut the fuck up," Cid growled. "After the hell you put me through, you don't have the right to talk to me. You're just going to shut up and listen, got it?"

"…all right, Cid."

Furious again, Cid carried Vincent well beyond the burning building and the crowds it was starting to attract, Vincent's weight heavy on his shoulder. Coming to a clearing beyond an old stone wall that was deserted, he set the ex-Turk down and drew his hand back to slap him. Vincent just closed his eyes, waiting for it, and instead Cid sighed and pulled him into a hug.

"Do you have so little faith in me, Vince?" he asked softly. "Or do you just hate yourself so much?"

Vincent pulled back so he could see his face. "Cid, I only did what I had to do to protect you."

"And I told you that's all bullshit," Cid told him, his voice softer than he could ever have imagined. He kissed the dark-haired man softly on the lips. "You're not cursed, baby. You just think you are because your life has been so fucked up to now." Vincent opened his mouth and he put a finger over it. "Just listen. There isn't some fuckin' force out to get you and now all our enemies are dead. Nobody in the whole wide world wants to hurt you, or hurt me to get to you. Got it?"

Vincent looked down. "But… everyone always dies…"

"Has Cloud? Has Tifa? You care about them, don't you?" Vincent's eyes lifted up to him again and Cid sighed. "Vincent, I swear to you, on everything I hold holy, I will not die by violence. I'll even -" he winced. "-stop smoking for you, so you don't have to worry about any fucking lung cancer." A tiny smile danced briefly on the dark-haired man's lips. "Hey, if you want, I'll outlive you too."

Vincent blinked. "Uh, I'm not sure that I'm even aging anymore."

Cid kissed his forehead. "That's what steamrollers are for."

Vincent barked a laugh at that which was half sob. "How can you love me?"

"Because you're my everything," Cid told him, hoping his answer didn't sound as sappy as he thought it did. He took his hand. "Will you let me take you home?"

Vincent looked at him for a moment that was endless. "Yes, Cid," he agreed at last.

"Ah, heaven," Cid sighed, taking a long deep drag on his cigarette. Standing leaning against the open door of the hangar, he looked towards the house just as the front door opened. "Shit!" Quickly, he stubbed out the cigarette and got rid of the butt before he was spotted.

"Boy, boss, has he ever got you whipped," one of his crew teased as he passed.

"Shut up," Cid muttered, eyes on Vincent.

The ex-Turk had abandoned his usual black suit and red cloak on their return to Rocket Town. The vampire look didn't have much place in a town full of more practical people who had enough to deal with, what with their mayor taking a lover who wasn't completely human to look at anyway. Instead he wore a white T-shirt and tight jeans, boots on his feet, a glove over his claw, and the bulk of his black hair pulled back into a ponytail. Enough of it still drifted loose, falling across his face to make Cid lick his lips though. Vincent's hair, he'd discovered, was an instant aphrodisiac and once the ex-Turk figured that out, he'd taken blatant advantage of it.

They still had their problems, though. Vincent had had his head fucked with for too long to just let everything go so easily. Cid had needed to deal with his depressions and self-loathing more than once, but Vincent hadn't run. The pilot grinned, watching the slimmer man cross the runway towards him. And if nothing else, their sex life had been absolutely fantastic.

Vincent walked up and nestled against his side, his good arm going around him, then his eyes narrowed. "You've been smoking again."

"Shit. Your nose is too damn good, you know that?"

Vincent smiled slightly. "You made the promise, not me." He hugged him slightly and stepped back. "What do you want me to do today?"

Cid eyed him. Vincent had also given up his Mako-beast hunting habits, after listening to seven hours of Cid yelling that he didn't want him getting eaten and shit out by something he couldn't handle. He'd gone to work on the Highwind instead, for lack of anything else to do. The crew wasn't sure how to take it. Shera was unhappy, but the rest of them, Cid noticed, were starting to treat Vincent like his wife. He supposed it was the best way for them to look at it, since everyone knew for a fact that Vincent was sleeping with the boss and getting extra perks for it. Cid couldn't help it, he wanted to spoil his baby. But he didn't want Vincent to be dependent on him as his employee either.

"I'm haulin' a cargo to Midgar II t'day," he told him.

"Okay. I'll go help prep the ship."

Cid grabbed his arm as he tried to pass him. "Uh uh, I said I'm going to Midgar II." Vincent looked up at him, confused and a little hurt. "I got somethin' for ya. Come on."

Quickly, he led him around behind the hangar, taking the opportunity for a quick nibble on the ear when no one was watching. Behind the hangar, the Tiny Bronco sat in the sun, her windows gleaming. Cid gestured at her. "This here's my pride and joy."

"I know."

Cid put his arm around Vincent's neck. "She's yours."

Vincent stared at him. "W-what?"

"Well, you need a ship of your own if you're gonna be my partner in this fucking company. She's great for doing courier runs." Cid grinned at the stunned look on his lover's face.

"P-partner?"

"Sure! You wanna be my partner don't you? It's not like she's all that damn hard to fly. You've got a pilot's license, right?"

"Yeah. Thirty years out of date!"

Cid hid a wince. "No problem. We'll have you set up in no time. Cid and Vince's air delivery service. How does that sound?"

Vincent shook his head. "I think you're nuts, but if you want me…"

Cid spun him in his arms to face him. "Always," he whispered and kissed him. Vincent returned the embrace and they stood there like that until the hooting crew of the Highwind turned the hose on them.